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AFTER CANCER: “WHY ME?”
What If I Am Asking “Why Me?” Now?
Interestingly, some people ask “Why me?” for the first time after treatment is completed. Shock, confusion, and preoccupation with the treatments may have kept you from asking this philosophical question until you tried to reintegrate yourself into the healthy world. The contrast between how other people look and feel and how you look and feel highlights just how much you have suffered and lost.
Why Me?
This is an age-old question that touches on your beliefs about the meaning of life and about God. The human condition is one that includes pain, loss, and death. There is no escaping the human condition. Use the question “Why me?” as a stimulus to explore your beliefs. Books, clergy, friends, and family can help you work toward an acceptable answer, or toward peace with no answer.
From a cold, practical point of view, unless the chance of your developing your type of cancer was zero before your diagnosis, your developing cancer was consistent with the probability. For example, if you had an l-in-1,000 chance of getting leukemia, developing leukemia would be in keeping with the probability.
From a more philosophical or existential view, the corollary question “Why not me?” may induce you to let the “Why me?” question rest.
If understanding the human condition does not quell your anger, disappointment, envy, confusion, or depression associated with seeing other people go along their apparently merry way while you struggle with recovery from cancer treatment, or if “Why me?” continues to affect your thoughts and feelings, seek assistance from clergy or counselors. Getting stuck in “Why me?” will trap you in your diagnosis. Finding acceptable answers or alternative, answerable questions will liberate you to move forward.
Find peace with the “Why me?” question so that you can move on to a more practical one: “What can I do about my situation now?”
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