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AFTER CANCER: FEELINGS. ANNIVERSARY REACTION
What Is an “Anniversary Reaction”?
People often develop symptoms or emotions around the time of the anniversary of an event. Consciously and subconsciously, anniversary dates of births, deaths, weddings, divorces, accidents, and traumas such as theft or rape rekindle deep emotions.
After cancer you have new anniversaries, such as that of your diagnosis, that of completing treatment and that of a bone marrow transplant that was a lifesaver. The anniversary reaction can consist of any combination of feelings of anxiety, overwhelming gratitude, weepiness, sense of dislocation, exultation, and depression.
Common symptoms that occur around anniversaries include generalized anxiety, melancholy, sleeplessness, and irritability. People can also develop specific symptoms that may or may not be related to the anniversary event. An irritative cough may develop around the anniversary of a lung cancer diagnosis. Fatigue may develop around the anniversary of a bone marrow transplant. Friction between you and your spouse may develop near the anniversary of your diagnosis.
What Can Be Done about the Anniversary Reaction?
Recognize it as a conscious and subconscious remembering of an important event. Marvel at the complexity and intricacy of human behavior. Try to make it a “good” anniversary by focusing on the good aspects of where you are. Accept yourself if this is a difficult time for you. Arrange your schedule to accommodate your reactions, or schedule activities to distract you from unpleasant feelings. One family that survived the devastation of hurricane Andrew in 1992 made plans to see a big baseball game on the anniversary date in order to distract themselves from the memory of that terrifying experience. If you recognize what is happening, it will be less unsettling and you can plan for it in whatever way works best for you.
If you catch yourself reliving in your mind the original event of an unpleasant anniversary, train yourself to stop this counterproductive rumination. Think of something else, something positive and life affirming. On the anniversary of your diagnosis, do not dwell on the details of being told. Do not relive the drama in your mind. Reliving bad experiences, even if only in memory, revives the associated feelings. It is best to reinforce positive, good feelings.
See anniversaries as opportunities to reinforce good feelings about your life.
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